Modern Manners: Don’t ‘Make an Appearance’
Q: No matter what, it seems like every year the holiday parties I get invited to are all on the same night. Is it okay to go to more than one party on the same night? I also have friends I’m not super close with who always want to get together during the holidays when I hardly have any spare time. How do you say no without hurting someone’s feelings?
Holiday parties are something I look forward to each year, even more so than the holidays themselves. Several of my friends throw parties each year, but sadly, it’s impossible to attend each one. The month of December offers just a handful of weekend nights ideal for entertaining, which usually results in overlapping events. Although you may be tempted to party-hop the night away, resist the urge. I don’t recommend ‘making an appearance.’
Opt to hit parties that are likely to have many of your friends in attendance, and treat them as a mass catch-up session. This might also eliminate requests for coffee dates from people you’ve not seen all year, those who you can’t (or don’t really want to) squeeze into your busy December schedule. Decline those invites from not-so-close co-workers or acquaintances by telling the host that although you’d love to attend, you’ve previously accepted an invitation for an engagement the same evening. Thank them graciously for the invitation and wish them a happy holiday season. And of course, be sure to RSVP to each invitation no later than the “reply by” date.
Don’t party-hop, stop and party! Why you shouldn’t ‘make an appearance’ at multiple parties:
- Cutting out early and/or showing up (more than fashionably) late leaves you with the task doling out at least two apologies: one to announce your early departure, and one to explain your very delayed arrival.
- Don’t be a clock-watcher like the blond below, waiting for the perfect opportunity to make your escape. You’ll be too distracted to fully enjoy yourself, and the other guests will notice you’re preoccupied, too. Instead, settle in and catch up with the crowd. Don’t cut conversations short in hopes of making a more timely arrival at your next destination.
- Party-hopping gives off the impression that you have better places to be, more important people to see. If there is somewhere you’d rather be, just go there in the first place. No party host should be made to feel like their event is second on your list.
Images Via: Paperless Post | X-Ray Delta One | Formal Fringe
Modern Manners has the answers to your etiquette uncertainties. Have a specific question? Please ask Ashley in the the comments below, send an email to askashley[at]movelifestyle[dot]com or send a tweet to @movelifestyle with the hashtag #MoveAskAsh.