Move LifeStyle

Move LifeStyle

Lose Control

I am a capital C, capital F, Control Freak. I love labels, label makers, colored pencils and all the tools of organization that the Container Store has to offer. When I was in high school, my friends called me ‘MOM’ because of the enormous day planner that was my constant companion. Yes, you know the one… with all the colored tabs, the numbered weeks with lines for every fifteen minute increment of every day, the attached address book, and all the different colored sticky flags … ahhh, so glorious. But, I digress.

I didn’t realize that all that organization stressed me out, until I went to college and met Mark.

You see, I lived and died by my watch. It was the metronome that kept my life from falling apart. I could parcel my life into incremental bite size moments that I could control, measure, file away and admire after their completion, but when I was with Mark, I had to take the watch off. It was his rule. Because when I was with him, I was off the clock.

Without my watch, I felt so naked. So vulnerable. So scared. He knew that my watch was my Linus blanket, the single thing without which, I felt like I could not breathe. He made me trust him. I freaked out. A lot. And I fell in love.

The romance ended with the summer, but I learned a valuable lesson. Life is unpredictable, but it’s in that chaos where we grow. I grew more from that experience than from any college lecture course that year, because I learned that I could be brave. The heartbreak made me stronger, because he taught me that in my most vulnerable, naked state, I was beautiful, worthy, and strong.

So, for the New Year, I want you to remind yourself to be brave. Be vulnerable. Take off that proverbial watch every once in a while and lose control. Yup, that’s me in that picture, jumping off a bridge in New Zealand. But hey, you don’t even have to take my word for it. You can listen to smarty pants researcher/storyteller Brene Brown and she’ll tell you a little something about vulnerability:

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make new mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.” ― Neil Gaiman

This month, we’re serving up bite-sized advice from experts in different fields to help us all make life a little brighter, more creative and more efficient for 2013. Think of this month as a chance to connect with yourself on a deeper level, get closer to what makes you happy, and take control of the balance in ‘work-life balance’ for yourself this year.

Author Description

Jenn Wong

Jenn Wong - the Urban Ninja - is the publisher and host of Way of The Wong, a contributor to the LA tech blog lalawag, and has covered the LA cocktail community in Angeleno Magazine. You can find her online @wayofthewong | @wayofthewong on Instagram

  • Brittany
    This is incredible! Thanks @justjennwong :)!!
  • Kristen
    That is amazing advice Jenn! My problem is the opposite though, I wish I had the proverbial watch on more than off…something I’m working on though:)
    • Jenn Wong
      Thanks Kristen! I think it works both ways – that the act of putting on a watch puts you in the mood to “do work” – at least it does for me, because it feels physical & has a weight to it, that reminds me that it’s time for business :) or maybe it’s not a watch, maybe it’s glasses or something physical that you wear that puts you in the mood to focus…. I’d love to hear what you discover :)
  • Autumn Reeser
    What a gorgeous Ted talk from Brene Brown and a great article, Jenn — such strong advice that I will be taking to heart this year.
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  • Capt. Blue
    We don’t plan to make mistakes, nor do we wish for others to make mistakes. When mistakes are made because of carelessness, or a lack of paying attention to details, the degree of the mistake will determine its outcome and consequences. However, relationship mistakes are more complicated and often are accompanied by heavy emotions and indelible memories. I rather deal with the former kinds of mistakes which can be either resolved or written off. LN
  • Anya Zhukova
    Losing control is the hardest thing for me to do. But this year I promise I’ll try to follow your advice, Jenn.
  • Sylvia Hendershott
    Did I mention how much I love this post?? Beautifully written, beautiful message, beautiful photo. And completely perfect pour moi. Time to make some awesome bitchin huge mistakes!! XOXO
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Move LifeStyle is an e-zine for the modern working woman created by Autumn Reeser, Jenn Wong and Ashley Fauset.

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